Why I'm Quitting Social Media As An Emerging Midlife Artist

Painted Sign- Dead End by Althea Jones

At 43, I have been enjoying my journey as an emerging artist. I have met a lot of great people and developed some really meaningful relationship. Recently, Instagram suspended my account because of my use of the word prostitute. This censorship was a wake up call for me and has encouraged me to do something that might seem counterintuitive in today’s creative economy: I am quitting social media all together. Not because I don't care about building an audience, but because I care too much about my art, my time, and my well-being.

The Promise of Social Media

I was always hesitant to join the social media band wagon, feeling like it was an intrusion into my personal life. I mean my coworker from eight years ago doesn't need to see pics of me and my mom. I even made a piece based on my feelings about the dead end/never ending cycle of excess and lack (see image above.)

But when I moved to Akron and got more serious about my art career, I folded. I went all in on my Instagram and used it to promote my work and build new relationships. And while I was able to have some moderate successes with my 3500 followers (not small, not large), in the end I was reminded that these social media platforms are not the supportive, nonbiased save spaces we believe them to be.

The Cost

Just when I had gotten a rhythm of posting that didn't make me feel anxious or incapable, my account was taken away from me. All of the images don't have backups and all of the poems don't have copies. I've been disconnected from friends on the other side of the world and have had to completely rethink how to move forward with marketing and communications.

While I wouldn't call the last 3 years wasted, I can say with out a doubt that I am frustrated and a bit discouraged. Maybe I've been spoiled by my high engagement and conversion rates. And for sure I have lost many hours of my life doom scrolling like everyone else.

The Myth of Needing It to Succeed

Now that my account has been suspended, I am left with the decision whether to start a new account or move on. Many of us can't imagine life with out social media and I too have become accustomed to the validation and community that I subconsciously or consciously associate with the platform.

Most applications ask for your socials. Most people as for your socials. You list them on your business cards and website, and in many cases people use social media instead of business cards or websites.

So many times I have chatted with friends and colleagues about the woes of social media only for them to end the conversation with, "Yeah but I have to for business."

I have come to the end of that road. I am an artist whose main media is conversation and whose conversations will always revolve around the things no one wants to discuss. I want to use the word PROSTITUTE, because that's how I felt. Because, that's sometimes how I feel. I want to have the hard talk about how we see and interact with each other. But using soft words like unalive or grape, don't do it for me.

And yes it may limit my reach, but what is that reach worth at the compromise of my beliefs and creativity.

In the title of this post, I used the the words midlife and emerging very consciously. Emerging because of the fear that going against the stream can cause while you are still in the season of foundation building. Midlife because of the revelations and convictions I have come to in my 40s.

Previously, I was susceptible to the pressures of expectations. I was desiring of the validation and praise of others. I was a people pleaser to the max and suffered greatly for it. But the clarity and urgency of middle age has made me much more like Dorothy then Rose and even sometimes as spicy as Sophia.

In the today, validation seeking turns my stomach and feels truly wrong. Beginning my life's dream in the second stage of my life makes my urgency to be true to me more important than seeking approval or going with the flow.

Why go through all of this just to recreate the corporate and societal prisons that I operated within during the first half of my life?

Starting a new account after being wrongly suspended feels like seeking validation and I ain't doing it.

What I'm Doing Instead

Instead, I am going to use my website as my platform. The website that I control and pay for.

My goal is to put the same amount of energy that I was using on social media into my blog posts and website allowing it to be a vibrant and flourishing home for my ideas and community.

Earlier this week, I played around with some poetry and today I'm posting again which it rare for me. My goal is to keep this going. So, expect more random work, thoughts, and info as we move forward.

How You Can Help

And if you realize you haven't heard from me in a while, feel free to reach out and check on me. I'm probably sitting at my desk staring onto the abyss.

Another way you can help me is by sharing my blog posts just as you would social media postings. Grab the link and send it to your friends if you feel like it is interesting and worthy. You can post links to Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram DM (Just don't say prostitute), Formerly Twitter, Text, Email, Smoke Signal, Football note, etc.

Or you can just enjoy it and go about your day.

Either way we will go on and continue this creative journey that we have begun, me and my fellow artists and art lovers. And whether we change the world or not we will definitely change our world.